Editorial for Portfolio – givemeclouttokens

America Needs to Stop its Opioid Addiction

On november 2nd, the American government passed a bill that could potentially bring down the famously high price of widely used drugs across America. According to the article, “The American Way of Paying for Drugs isn’t Working,” the pharmaceutical industry could lose as much as one trillion dollars in profit from this bill according to the article, while widely used drugs will come down in price by about 158 billion dollars over all. This has happened in perfect timing; the American public is in need to realize  the dangers of the drugs they are consuming. The CDC confirms that there has been more than 70,000 deaths by drug overdose in the united states in 2017 alone. American citizens are in a huge battle with themselves and their drugs. The American public will be hit face first with the fact that pharmaceutical drugs will not solve their poor diet choices and health problems, and that the drugs will only push them into their own downfall. With 70,000 people dying from drug overdoses, the problem is becoming apparent. The lowering cost of drugs is granting American citizens the ability to get more drugs for less money. This revelation is going to bring about a massive drug epidemic. When americans are prescribed and buy pain killers, they are most likely to become addicted. Americans are in a tough time, with most of the income and wealth being taken away,  Americans need their own way to cope with it. As a country, we need to fight this epidemic and realize that these drugs will not be the answer to all of our problems, they will only numb them. America needs to come together to realize that people will be falling into the temptation to buy more of these drugs, and we need to make sure that these people don’t end up loathing in their self destruction in America’s future.

 

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18 Responses to Editorial for Portfolio – givemeclouttokens

  1. voxpopuli75 says:

    Your editorial definitely makes a bold claim, however more evidence is required to support this claim. Right now the only evidence you present seems to be your own personal opinion about what would happen if drug prices were lowered. More content would greatly benefit your editorial. In addition, adding more information about the bill such as the bill’s name would help educate readers who have never heard of the bill before.

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  2. ahntkd99 says:

    This topic and author’s thinking is interesting but the author needs to provide more evidence.

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  3. lucbe219 says:

    I found this article to be very persuasive, yet it was missing some crucial evidence to support the thesis and claims being made about the opioid epidemic in America. I agree with the claim that bringing down the prices of drugs will make them much easier to buy and will also result an even larger increase in opioid addictions across America. However, there needs to be more support to your statements like examples from the text to make more of your readers agree and trust your opinion.

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  4. ajuuy7 says:

    The point of view of the author seems interesting and unique. There is a lot of opinion that isn’t backed up with anything, but if certain things do get backed up then it will be a great work with the ‘voice of god.’ I think it should say somewhere that the prices are supposed to drop or it can talk more about the current addiction problem with a statistic or something about it.

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  5. mpsj13 says:

    This position is certainly interesting, but the writing does not persuade me toward your opinion. To begin, I do not see the connection of mentioning the monetary facts to your position. It leads me to believe I will be reading why this change would not be worth the cost, but you then shift the focus entirely to cheaper pharmaceuticals will lead to opioid addiction. In addition, there is no real backing to why this will lead to an opioid epidemic. You just say that it will happen without any reasoning. I feel that evidence and elaboration will help your argument.

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  6. roses0102 says:

    I like tokens position on the topic and the uniqueness of it, but the writing is missing some key evidence to back up this point., For most people, this view on addiction will take a lot of convincing to get someone else to believe. With substantial evidence it is much easier to convince someone on your opinion. Add some other sources in about rises in addiction and the causes and try to create a plausible statement on why your thesis could be true.

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  7. Valcom says:

    The author does not show evidence or support claims made within the article but do state the main points and attempts to support them. Overall the main point is shown but not supported – by adding more support and evidence to the small amount of claims the change would be drastic and better.

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  8. compclass8 says:

    This is good but there is very little evidence (and when there is it is weak) to support the points. There needs more evidence to support the overall idea.

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  9. comp0327 says:

    The author’s claim is interesting, but more textual evidence is needed to push this claim further.

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  10. hershey515 says:

    I agree to this writing piece is written but it is lacking evidence to back up their claim. Going into more depth will also help maximize the length of the writing because it is short and with more evidence it can prove your thesis. The tone of the writing piece also tends to change as you go along

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  11. bane1900 says:

    The stance on this topic is extremely controversial which makes readers want to read more, but you need more factual/statistical evidence in order to support your point to the fullest potential.

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  12. doglover441 says:

    The author doesn’t provide much hard evidence about the topic however they state the main and important points about the subject. The author could have shown their opinion earlier in the piece but they do include a clear opinion that is not confusing or can be misunderstood.

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  13. This is good. You need more support and opinion on your point of view. There is no “evidence” to support your very few points.

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  14. iamsleepy01 says:

    Does live up to the name and the opinion was really well stated and persuasive.

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  15. athenapup4 says:

    Your points listed as to why we need to stop Opioid addiction in america are good however there are very few points. This essay is on the short side with no “evidence” to your statements. Try citing sources from where you find your information from and go a little more into detail. Giving more evidence will lengthen your writing, just remember not to say anything you already said. You need new evidence.

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  16. lelebxby says:

    In”America Needs to Stop its Opioid Addiction,” their radical premise is carried very well through out the editorial. The author’s opinion of the matter is very original and bold and does a great job at elaborating on the subject.

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  17. lovericeandnoodles says:

    good I agree that if drugs are cheaper more people will become addicted or dependent on such drugs

    Liked by 1 person

  18. davidbdale says:

    Tokens, I’m doing a quick round of feedback this morning to get the revision ball rolling. Feel free to put your post back into Feedback Please if you want more reactions or a different sort of feedback.

    I love the audacity of the premise, that the unintended consequence of the lowering of the cost of prescription drugs will be a massive surge in addictions. To support it, you would need to show that the cost of THOSE ADDICTIVE DRUGS would be reduced and that THE HIGH COST OF THOSE DRUGS has been effective at so far limiting the addiction epidemic. I wonder if you can do that or find a workaround.

    Your tone needs some work. You seem at first to be delighted that America will get a needed wakeup call and come to its senses regarding addiction. But you follow that immediately with a dire prediction that even more of us will turn to drug abuse. The disconnect is jarring and never quite resolved.

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