Writing Plan-Cynicalwordsmith

Supporting the Wrong Right

Thesis:

The second amendment may be a right to all Americans–however, this right is only infringing on the right of fellow citizens to feel safe by using a broken system to allow people to purchase weapons of war and violence. Gun control is a growing necessity in America that most definitely will save the lives of not only our current citizens, but future generations to come.

Background and Evidence:

The number of mass shootings in America has exponentially increased as of September of 2019. At this date, 244 days into the year, there had been more mass shootings recorded than days in the year. 283 had been recorded, and this figure has only risen. https://www.cbsnews.com/news/mass-shootings-2019-more-mass-shootings-than-days-so-far-this-year/

Many states require little in the area of purchasing a fire-arm, even semi-automatic weapons. When the ease of purchasing firearms is discussed, it is often said it only takes minutes to acquire such an object. In thirty-three states, the rules and regulations are said to be more lenient, with the problem of private sellers not doing background checks. https://www.businessinsider.com/how-to-buy-a-gun-2017-10

Sources I have Found:

https://www.cbsnews.com/news/mass-shootings-2019-more-mass-shootings-than-days-so-far-this-year/

The length between mass casualty shootings is shortening, with 283 occurring this year, two of them within twenty-four hours of each other. These events are becoming more frequent it seems, with 9,932 gun deaths as of September first.

https://www.businessinsider.com/how-to-buy-a-gun-2017-10

While many may think buying a gun is difficult in their states, this article entails the details of certain states in regards to the steps in purchasing a firearm. In thirty-three states, private sellers take up shop in hopes of consuming bigger checks due to their lack of checking on their customers before their purchases made. New laws around guns and gun safety have been implemented in places such as Nevada but are rarely enforced.

Sources I haven’t Found Yet

I’d like to find a figure for the amount of gun deaths versus the lives saved by guns.

I’d also like to find more information on the way guns are sold and what criteria one must meet to obtain them and what extent the laws are enforced.

I would like to include why guns should not be the go-to for self defense and are not as safe as some may think.

I would like to include statistics on the success of gun control in other countries.

Counterarguments I need to Refute:

Guns save more lives than harm, they protect and are away of self defense.

If guns are taken away they will just be bought on the black market

Gun control hinders the rights of every day Americans and is unconstitutional.

The media over-televises mass shootings to make the public believe there is a gun epidemic happening in the United States.

Gun control will not fix anything, and will put citizens at risk.

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1 Response to Writing Plan-Cynicalwordsmith

  1. davidbdale says:

    First, I appreciate the seriousness of your meaningful topic. I see that you’ve appropriately included VERY contemporary statistics to assure readers you’re writing about a problem that is current and urgent.

    Now, a note on a troubling trend I hope will not continue into your portfolio drafts, Wordsmith.

    The number of mass shootings in America has exponentially increased . . . and this figure has only risen.

    I only now was praising you for emphasizing the “trend” nature of your argument, but I need to caution you that a trend is not a necessary component of urgency. If the number is massive and catastrophic, it can remain static without any loss of emergency. Obviously you mean something else: We’re doing nothing to REDUCE these numbers, and the evidence is that they keep INCREASING. Either way, reduction is the key.

    Now another note on style:

    IT IS OFTEN SAID it only takes minutes to acquire such an object. In thirty-three states, the rules and regulations ARE SAID to be more lenient, with the problem of private sellers not doing background checks.

    Use IS SAID language ONLY when the truth of the claims is unknown. Readers will correctly interpret: “OJ is said to have murdered his wife” to mean that you don’t think he did it. If it DOES take just minutes to get a semi-automatic weapon; if rules ARE more lenient in thirty-three states (and by definition, they MUST be), then say it does, and say they are.

    Here you do it again:

    While MANY MAY THINK buying a gun is difficult in their states, this article entails the details of certain states in regards to the steps in purchasing a firearm. In thirty-three states, private sellers take up shop in hopes of consuming bigger checks due to their lack of checking on their customers before their purchases made.

    In other ways too, those sentences are not worthy of your Portfolio, so don’t let their like show up there. Here’s what your sentences mean (I think):

    Contrary to popular opinion, getting a gun is catastrophically easy in thirty-three states where private sellers ignore background checks to boost their profits.

    Regarding your SEEK and COUNTER sections:
    —I don’t think you’ll find a number for “lives saved by guns.” How would such a number be calculated?
    —You don’t have room in 1000 words for a survey of 50 state laws and their enforcement. You do need some alarming numbers to make your case, but not a thorough investigation.
    —There ARE numbers for how often homeowners defend their homes with a handgun SUCCESSFULLY vs. how often they fail (and get killed) (sometimes with their own gun).
    —Statistics from other countries are also easy to find and useful in making your case. Took me 20 seconds to find this gem:
    https://www.businessinsider.com/gun-deaths-nearly-eliminated-in-countries-what-us-can-learn-2017-11

    —The black market argument is a tough one, especially in America where there are already WAY MORE guns than people.
    —I like your “MY rights are violated by irresponsible gun ownership” argument to counter the 2nd amendment refutation. There ARE competing rights. Always. We don’t let drunks drive. And we don’t let 14-year-olds drive. Reasonable regulations don’t violate rights.
    —You can use the “the media over-televises” observation to your benefit. If there have been 283 mass shootings this year, and we CERTAINLY do not hear about one every day, then MOST mass shootings go by without media attention.

    Anything helpful here, Wordsmith?
    Understandably, you won’t want to spend time revising your Writing Plan now that you’ve already posted an Op-Ed, so apply the feedback to your REAL post if it helps.

    Like

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