CLASS 26: TUE DEC 03

Candy Buttons Riddle

Badly-Attached Modifiers

The Ban on 2nd Person

Hipster Revisions Handout

Building Your Portfolio

 

28 Responses to CLASS 26: TUE DEC 03

  1. tenere84 says:

    Notes 12/3

    Riddle: Candy Buttons Riddle. If the picture provided is of candy buttons, what is the picture of a mat with bumps resembling the candy buttons? I call it Feet Braille.

    Badly-Attached Modifiers

    – Misplaced modifiers confuse readers, and it takes good practice to avoid them.
    – If a modifier refers to a specific subject, that subject should continue to be used for the rest of the sentence and not be replaced with a different one.
    – For example, in the sentence, “Trying to save money, potatoes and other cheap foods filled the shopper’s cart,” the modifier is “Trying to save money” and refers to a person. Because of the misplaced modifier, it’s saying that potatoes and other cheap foods are trying to save money.
    – An improved sentence would be, “Trying to save money, the shopper filled his car with potatoes and other cheap foods.”

    The Ban on 2nd Person

    – We are banned from using the 2nd person in academic essays because they innappropriately drag our readers into arguments in which they don’t belong, ask them to imagine themselves in situations in which they will never be, and makes things unnecessarily and unreasonably personal.
    – Substituting 2nd-person pronouns with “one” avoids the error but results in a graceless sentence, especially if there are too many “ones.”
    – Instead, replace them with specific pronouns relevant to the discussion. Class nouns work well.
    – Replacing 2nd-person pronouns with “we” is another good suggestion as it creates a bond between the reader and writer. Just be sure to choose the inclusive pronoun carefully.

    Hipster Revisions
    – The paragraph provided claimed that hipsters are appealing to the youth and marketers are taking advantage of them.
    – The revision overall included better use of vocabulary, more “elegant” sentences, and the switching around of modifiers, and improved comma placement.

    Building Your Portfolio

    – Your portfolio must contain: LTE Draft, LTE for Portfolio, Editorial Draft, Editorial for Portfolio, Op-Ed Draft, and Op-Ed for Portfolio.
    – Submitting two versions of the three main essays is important because the differences between versions demonstrates your willingness to participate in the recursive exercise of writing as well as your mastery of the five core values.

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  2. comp0327 says:

    NOTES:
    -Riddle: the sidewalk buttons are for disabled people near street intersections and train stations.
    -Recursive process- you are willing to engage in a conversation with others about others’ opinions and learn something new from them
    -Discussed the portfolio and how to add to the portfolio
    -Misplaced modifiers; how to use and place modifiers so we don’t confuse readers
    -Do not use second person in academic essays.

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  3. bestbaker123 says:

    Notes 12/3/19:
    – Riddle: The dots are for people who can’t see if it is safe to walk any further. They are usually placed at intersections and near the end of the tracks at the subway. It is to let the person know that it is dangerous to go any further.
    – Final Portfolio: get everything together and put it into the username portfolio by TUE DEC 10
    – If you want to correctly interpret the sentence, make sure you say “I” or put a person after the subject you are talking about so it doesn’t confuse the reader.
    Ex. While getting out of bed, the alarm clock woke up my wife.
    Correct way to say it: While I got out of bed the alarm clock rang, waking up my wife.
    This makes things clear and leaves no room for confusion.
    – Don’t use 2ND person when you are writing academic essays. It makes your reader think that you know what they think more than themselves. It is insulting and presumptuous of the writer to address the reader as “you.”
    – You want the reader to think you are on the same side as them, even if you aren’t. Saying “we” makes it seem like you guys are united in the way you think.
    – When making moral judgements and ethical imperatives, say “we” to make a stronger impact on the reader.

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  4. jackso23 says:

    Notes 3 December 2019
    – We started with a “sidewalk” riddle where we tried to identify what the section of sidewalk with dots on them are and why they are there.
    – We went over how to change and better the modifiers that we use in our writing
    – 2nd person is bad and we shouldn’t use it by any means unless we have to
    – We discussed portfolio mechanics
    – Went over how to properly structure and formulate a paragraph to make sense

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  5. kraemercali says:

    12/3
    candy pieces and rigged sidewalk, feet braille
    how to put together portfolio
    badly attached modifiers
    hipsters, what they are how they are modernized, how people over hype it
    do refection and begin constructing portfolio

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  6. lucbe219 says:

    We began class today by trying to make up a three to four word name for the red rivets at the ends of sidewalks that assist the blind. Next, we discussed the upcoming steps we need to take to finalize our portfolios. We need to move the seven papers over into the portfolio with our username to keep all of our work in order. Towards the end of class we went over badly attached modifiers and rewrote six sentences to see if we got the hang of the lesson. We also need to ban the usage of the second person in our academic writing. Instead of using “you” we could say “one” or “we” to avoid offending our readers, or most commonly, we should use a noun for whoever is being talked about. To end class, we went over revising a hipster paragraph to find all of its hidden ideas and expand on them to make a better paragraph.

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  7. 12/3
    NOTES
    Riddle
    – Candy button riddle
    – Picture of mat that is laid out at intersections, but contain no name
    – Asked what we think they should be called and the best name came to be foot braille
    – They’re generally there for blind people to be able to tell when they’re at an intersection
    Building Your Portfolio
    – Prof reminded us of all the 7 items that will be inserted into our final portfolio
    – The more your final is different from your draft it is most likely better and you used more techniques learned
    – We need all assignments in by next Tuesday in order for Prof to properly grade our work by the time we have meetings with him
    Badly Attached Modifiers
    – Example of what a bad modifier was
    – Given task to correct 6 sentences and make them what they are meant to be
    – Something may sound right when you right it, but make sure you reread it and ask yourself if it would confuse the reader not you
    Banned Second Person
    – All second person pronouns should be removed from all writings as it makes it seem as it’s a one on one convo when it’s not
    – A replacement for “you” is “one” although it is a older fashioned input
    – “we” could be used in some situations in place of “you”
    – Substitute it with a class noun which in this situation would be Ex-convicts
    – “we” is used to use you as the writer in place along with others to show that you need to do the same as what your expressing
    Hipster Revisions
    – Looked at a paragraph that is choppy and isn’t written correct
    – If written in correct sequence it could make your claim much better
    – sentence arrangement could perfect your writing

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  8. Valcom says:

    Candy Foot Riddle
    [] Class started by showing the class the candy called “sugar dots”. Then by showing us an image of what looks like a flat lego, the flat lego is meant to stop and direct blind people.
    Building Your Portfolio
    [] The final portfolio should include
    Draft Letter to the Editor, LTE for Portfolio, Draft Editorial, Editorial for Portfolio, Draft Op-Ed, Op-Ed for Portfolio, Reflective Statement
    -The purpose of the final portfolio is to demonstrate the students willingness to participate in writing and the effective writing changes the student has made.
    – Students should continue to revise Portfolio until graded, December 10th Portfolio check of completion
    [] 2nd Person should be banned and removed from paragraphs.

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  9. Candy Buttons Riddle
    – Edible sugar dots that are multicolored and on strips of paper. A popular and older candy treat.
    – Dotted sidewalk mats at intersections don’t seem to have a popular established name. A good name would be foot braille because they are very important for blind people to know when they come to an intersection and it resembles the dot format of braille.
    Building Your Portfolio
    – Portfolio needs to be full finished and put together by 12-10 Tuesday.
    – When our portfolio is verified complete, we will be permitted to sign up for a Grade Conference with our professor on either THU DEC 12 or TUE DEC 17.
    – Start moving drafts into our portfolio
    The Ban on 2nd Person
    – We don’t use 2nd person in academic writing
    – Using “you” in a conversation includes the reader into it in a way that can be detrimental, so we take them all out.

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  10. ajuuy7 says:

    We learned that those dotted looking sidewalks are for blind people to be aware that there is street crossing or a train platform ahead. We need to move 7 pieces of our work into the portfolio category. Modifying sentences can be confusing and we need to be more aware of what we’re actually trying to say. “While getting out of bed this morning, the alarm clock woke my wife,” sounds like the alarm clock got out of bed. The only thing that should follow the beginning part of that sentence is saying I. We are not supposed to use second person in our writing because it brings readers personally into an argument that they may not like or want to be a part of. The hipster revision is very helpful to build our sentences more.

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  11. 12/3 Notes:
    -Always check your modifiers, they can make your writing very complicated and confusing for the reader.
    -Portfolio category has been created with your name on it, make sure to add necessary pieces to it sooner rather than later so that Dr. Hodges can begin grading.
    -The second person form of writing is not to EVER BE USED IN ACADEMIC WRITING, however, rather than overusing “one” or “we” or more unspecific, “they”, create a category/noun for the group your referencing.

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  12. mpsj13 says:

    Riddle
    -The dots found at an intersection or the edge of a train platform are used to allow people with disabilities such as blindness know where to stop.
    Build Portfolio
    -Two drafts are required to demonstrate the ability to take feedback and apply it.
    -To place in portfolio place item in Category Portfolio for mpsj13 (mpsj13 Portfolio)
    -Op-Ed needs links to other sources.
    -Reflective Statement needs links to own work
    Modifier Activity
    -Be careful to properly connect a modifier with the correct noun.
    -A singular entity, such as the shopper, needs a singular pronoun such as his or her
    Ban on 2nd person
    -“One” is an appropriate replacement for “you” but feels distant, clinical, and old.
    -A good solution for the ban on using “you” is to replace the word with a class noun rather than “you” or “one”
    -“We” is another good substitute to create a persuasive sentence.
    Hipsters Revision
    -The Hipster Revision Doc gives an example of a deep structural revision that can be applied to writings.
    *Find themes and relocate them next to each other.
    *Place transitions so that the paragraph flows.

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  13. ahntkd99 says:

    12/3
    Candy Buttons Riddle
    – When they are edible, they are called Candy Buttons
    – When they show up on the street at intersections, they don’t have an established name

    Badly – Attached Modifiers
    – Misplaced modifiers confuse readers
    – They appear to modify what they don’t modify and not to modify what they do
    – To avoid the impression that the radio got out of bed, we need to revise the sentence to clarify the modification

    The Ban on 2nd Person
    – We are banned from using the 2nd person in academic essays
    – One commonly recommended workaround to the band on 2nd person is substitute one for you
    – Another recommended workaround is to substitute the first person plural we for the 2nd person

    Building Your Portfolio
    – Seven Items ( Draft Letter to the Editor, LTE for Portfolio, Draft Editorial, Editorial for Portfolio, Draft Op-Ed, Op-Ed for Portfolio, and Reflective Statement)
    – The purpose of including two drafts of each of your essays is to demonstrate your willingness to participate in the recursive exercise of writing and your effectiveness at doing so
    – The Mechanics : Open in Edit mode each of the items you want to include in your Portfolio, Add each item to the Portfolio category for your Username, Click Update, Repeat until you have 7 items in your Portfolio, Continue to revise your Portfolio versions if needed, You will be graded on the contents of your Portfolio whenever your Professor opens it for a last holistic reading
    – Deadline: Tue Dec 10
    – When your portfolio is verified complete, you’ll be permitted to sign up for a Grade Conference with your professor on either Thu Dec 12 or Tue Dec 17

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  14. bmdpiano says:

    NOTES:

    Riddle:
    -We call the candy piped onto paper “candy buttons”, but what do we call the bumpy mats on the sidewalks?
    -They are used for the blind to find intersections.

    Badly-Attached Modifiers:
    -While getting out of bed this morning, the alarm clock woke my wife.
    This is incorrect because the first clause does not contain “I” and neither does the second. This makes it look like the alarm clock got out of bed.

    -While I was getting out of bed this morning, the alarm clock woke my wife.
    This sentence is better.

    Ban on 2nd Person:
    -Not using “you”
    -The writing is not a two way conversion. The writing is supposed to inform and show someone else they there is agreement or disagreement.

    Hipster Revision Handout:
    -Showing transitions in sentences.
    -Sentences need to flow in order to get ideas across to the readers.

    Building the Portfolio:
    -Should contain 7 items
    -The drafts shows the purpose of recursive writing and the willingness to participate in it.
    -The two drafts should be vastly different.
    -To put the portfolio together, put each item in username Portfolio.

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  15. voxpopuli75 says:

    12/3/19
    – 7 items should be in our portfolio before we submit it. Make sure to include the first and final drafts of your essays in the portfolio
    – Grade conferences will be held on DEC 12th and DEC 17th, make sure to sign up online.
    – Misplaced modifiers confuse readers. Use modifiers correctly in order to eliminate ambiguity.
    -EX: Don’t use: “While getting out of bed this morning, the alarm clock woke my wife.”
    Instead use: “While I was getting out of bed this morning, the alarm clock woke my wife.”
    – 2nd person is not used in academic writing. Don’t put your reader in places they don’t want to be/don’t belong. Leave your reader out of your writing all together.
    – A good substitute for “you” can be “we”.

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  16. lg102015 says:

    Class Notes
    Riddle- The side walk buttons are for the blind to feel where the intersection is. Completely different from the candy dots we first went over.
    Building your portfolio- We went over what is necessary to complete your portfolio for the semester, and how to submit your portfolio.
    Things that are included in your portfolio-
    1. Draft Letter to the Editor
    2. LTE for Portfolio
    3. Draft Editorial
    4. Editorial for Portfolio
    5. Draft Op-Ed
    6. Op-Ed for Portfolio
    7. Reflective Statement
    Badly attached Modifiers- These confuse people, they modify what they don’t modify and not to modify what they do. Once you recognize them they are easy to fix. We then went over sentences as a class that needed to be fix.
    The ban on 2nd Person- When writing we stay away from the use of 2nd person, because it brings the readers into situations they don’t belong in.
    For example: When you are released from prison, you are 3 times more likely to end up back in prison within 10 years than if you had never gone to prison in the first place.
    You could fix fix this statement by saying: When criminals are released from prison, they are 3 times more likely to end up back in prison within 10 years than if they had never gone to prison in the first place.
    Hipster Revisions- We went over a paragraph on the trouble with hipsters and then as a class we took the paragraph apart and revised it piece by piece.

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  17. yankeefan25 says:

    Class Notes
    We first went over the candy button riddle. The mats on the sidewalk are used so that blind people know where the sidewalk meets the intersection. They are also used on the edges of train platforms so no one wanders into the tracks.
    Next we went over how to build our portfolio. We each dropped a draft into our Portfolio category so we knew how to do it.
    When we are writing we have to make sure that the modifiers we use are not being attached to the wrong things. In the example we meant to say that we woke our wife, but the sentence lead the reader to believe that the alarm clock was the one that got out of bed and woke the wife.
    Always stay clear of you or one or they. Instead classify the people or say we and share the responsibility.

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  18. I appreciated how Mr. Hodges asked the class how much anxiety we are experiencing as a class and I’m starting to feel a lot better which was a very timely question. He then started going over the portfolio tasks and how we will meet o discuss our grade based on the portfolio assignments. We talked about modifying sentences and how to place the correct modifiers to make a subject clear in a sentence. We had 6 sentences to proofread for practice and post as a reply to the post.

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  19. 12/3/19 Notes
    Candy Buttons Riddle:
    – We come up with names for the dots we see at intersections that resemble candy buttons.
    Building Your Portfolio:
    – Your portfolio should contain seven assignments.
    – For each of the seven items, click edit and add them to the Portfolio category for your Username.
    – Continue to revise your Portfolio versions if needed.
    – When your portfolio is verified complete, you’ll be permitted to sign up for a Grade Conference with your professor on either THU DEC 12 or TUE DEC 17.
    Badly-Attached Modifiers:
    – Misplaced modifiers confuse readers.
    – We discuss one example, and correct five other phrases on our own.
    The Ban on 2nd Person:
    – Using the 2nd person in academic essays inappropriately drags our readers into arguments they don’t belong in.
    – One commonly recommended workaround to the ban on 2nd person is to substitute one for you.
    – A preferred workaround to the ban on 2nd person is substituting a class noun.
    – Another recommended workaround is to substitute the first person plural we for the 2nd person you.

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  20. Candy Buttons Riddle: what should we call the block of dots on street intersections? dotty dots.

    Badly-Attached Modifier: Solved problems by cutting and pasting the badly-written sentences into a reply and revising them.

    The Ban on 2nd Person: We are banned from using the 2nd person in academic essays for the perfectly good reason that its use inappropriately drags our readers into arguments they don’t belong in, asks them to imagine themselves in situations they will never be in, and makes things personal that shouldn’t be. One commonly recommended workaround to the ban on 2nd person is to substitute one for you. Another recommended workaround is to substitute the first person plural we for the 2nd person you.

    Building Your Portfolio: Deadline is Dec. 10!!!

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  21. hershey515 says:

    Comp 8 AM Class Notes

    Candy Foot Riddle
    – [ ] A picture of edible candy dots and they are called candy buttons and we then had a picture of a sidewalk with dots called foot- Braille
    Building Your Portfolio
    – [ ] Your finished Portfolio should include
    1. Draft Letter to the Editor
    2. LTE for Portfolio
    3. Draft Editorial
    4. Editorial for Portfolio
    5. Draft Op-Ed
    6. Op-Ed for Portfolio
    7. Reflective Statement
    – [ ] The purpose is to demonstrate willingness to participate in writing and your effectiveness to do so
    – [ ] Continue to revise Portfolio until graded
    – [ ] December 10th Portfolio Verification, double check of completion
    Badly-Attached Modifiers
    – [ ] I must always come after;by
    – [ ] Misplaced modifiers can confuse the readers, they tend to modify what they don’t modify

    The Ban of Second Person
    – [ ] Banned in using 2nd person in our writing because it can inappropriately drag our readers into arguments that they don’t belong inside or

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  22. iamsleepy01 says:

    3 categories for portfolio: Username, XXXX for Portfolio, and Username Portfolio
    – Badly used modifiers can confuse a reader. To fix it use a pronoun.
    – 2nd person- Don’t use it. It inappropriately drags the readers into arguments they don’t belong in(asking them to imagine themselves in situations they will never be in, and makes things personal that shouldn’t be.) Instead of using “you”. Use “one”, class noun, or “we”.

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  23. smellycat23 says:

    Candy buttons look awfully similar to the red “foot braille” at intersections for the handicapped.
    For our Portfolio, there should be seven assignments posted under Username Portfolio. It includes two versions of our three essays and the reflective statement. We will have a Portfolio Verification Double Check on December 10 and there will be a grade conference on either December 12 or 17.

    Mr. Hodges thinks that in some of our drafts, many of us start our sentences with “By….” This is a badly attached modifier just like writing, “While getting out of bed this morning, the alarm clock woke my wife.” This sounds like the alarm was getting out of bed, not the speaker. One example sentence we edited in class was, “Trying to save money, potatoes and other cheap foods filled the shopper’s cart,” this sounds like potatoes are trying to save money. This sentence could be changed to, “Trying to save money, I filled the shopper’s cart with potatoes and other cheap foods.”

    We don’t use the second person because it drags the reader into arguments they don’t belong in and makes things personal. Instead of using “you” we should substitute it with a class noun or first person plural, “we.”

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  24. Modifiers to sentences can sometimes confuse the readers. For example, “By texting my students, I told them I would be late,” is a correct statement. “By texting students, they learned that class would be late,” is an incorrect statement because it would mean that the students texted rather than the professor. When in writing, we must also avoid the use of second person, or the use or using “you” or “your” because it usually is incorrect and shows us as poor authors. Using phrases like “we” makes for a stronger argument and brings both the opinion of the author and the reader together.

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  25. lelebxby says:

    Class Notes – 12/3/19
    Badly-Attached Modifiers
    – Misplaced modifiers confuse readers.
    – They appear to modify what they don’t modify and not to modify what they do.
    – In class, we rewrote badly-written sentences to good, well-attached modifiers.
    The Ban on 2nd Person
    – By using the 2nd person in academic essays, it inappropriately drags the readers into arguments they don’t belong in.
    – Instead of using the 2nd person, a common practice is to substitute one for you.
    – Another workaround to replace the 2nd person lingo is to substitute we instead of you. By doing so, it creates a bond with the reader.
    Building Your Portfolio
    – We discussed the assignments needed to complete our portfolios and how to fix up anything missing from it.

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  26. compclass8 says:

    The dot candy that is attached on a piece of paper in a grid. The other picture seems like it is something that grips peoples shoes when they walk so they don’t slip. But they are really for blind people so they know they are at an intersection. Put all of the portfolio work into the category portfolio with your user name. Misplaced modifiers can confuse the readers. Don’t use the second person while writing in essays.

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  27. athenapup4 says:

    12/3 Notes

    Riddle: Candy Buttons. What would you call the candy button look-a-likes that are on sidewalks?
    Badly Attached Modifiers:
    “By”– starting a sentence with “by” is okay but you must follow up with an “I” in order for it to be correct. (By alerting my students there was a traffic jam, I notified the students I would be late)
    “While getting out of bed”— This modifier must be attached clearly to a person in order to avoid wrong assumptions. (Ex: While getting out of bed, the alarm clock woke my wife) This is wrong because the sentence is technically saying the alarm clock got out of bed.
    Completed the sentences in a reply
    The Ban on Second person: Don’t say you know what “you” are thinking while writing. Instead substitute the “you” for “one”.
    Building your Portfolio: portfolio will contain a draft of your three main argument paper and their final draft. So 6 papers. It will also contain a reflective statement. 2 drafts for each essay is required to show progress. Site the work of others in the portfolio version.
    Mechanics on how to create your portfolio is located in the link.

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  28. doglover441 says:

    -Candy Buttons Riddle, the sidewalk buttons are for blind people near street intersections
    -Recursive process pf writing means that you are willing to engage in a conversation with others about the opinions of other people and learn from them
    -Discussed the portfolio mechanics and what steps to follow to start adding our work to the portfolio
    -Misplaced modifiers confuse readers. They appear to modify what they don’t modify and not to modify what they do. Once recognized, they’re easy to avoid, but seeing them takes practice.
    -We are banned from using the 2nd person in academic essays for the perfectly good reason that its use inappropriately drags our readers into arguments they don’t belong in, asks them to imagine themselves in situations they will never be in, and makes things personal that shouldn’t be.
    -A recommended workaround is to substitute the first-person plural we for the 2nd person you. In addition to avoiding the ban, first person plural creates a bond with readers. Where addressing readers as you often sound accusatory, addressing them as we indicate we are in the situation together.

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