Editorial for Portfolio – Hershey

School Systems Have Had Enough

Systems Have Had Enough

Why is the rate of ingesting harmful chemicals into your body increasing rapidly in the lives of the young generation? Thanks to the invention of the technology of Juuls’, it is causing drastic health conditions and encouraging nicotine use among under aged groups. The enticing flavors and easily accessible usage creates a facade that makes unhealthy substances appeal to the youth. This is not only putting a strain on the health of those who are using but it is now affecting the educational systems. It has come to the point where Juuls’ are getting the retribution it deserves for hooking teens on to a harmful product. They should be made to pay for the damage their products cause on school campuses.

In Olathe Public Schools, the school districts have had enough with the way the use of Juuling has plummeted and how the use of these products reside mainly on school grounds. The rate in which e-cigarettes are being used by teens has reached its climax and must be stopped. Recent research states that, “The number of youth smokers has also been increasing. The CDC estimates that the number of middle and high school students who use e-cigarettes rose by more than 50% from 2017 to 2018 — from 2.1 million to 3.6 million.” The overwhelming fact that these harmful products are being used by such a young age is depressing. During a student’s life in middle school the development and growth process of becoming a teen has just begun, so now imagine ingesting harmful chemicals into your body.

In order to be able to make a difference in the future, school districts are filing lawsuits to help decrease the drastic incline of Juul use. “Schools across the country are so fed up with student’s vaping on campus that they’re suing the e-cigarette manufacturer Juul Labs. Multiple districts filed lawsuits on Monday, including school systems in Olathe, Kan.; St. Charles, Mo.; Long Island, N.Y.; and La Conner, Wash.” It has been way too long to not bring forth an end to the use of these Juuls’. The escalation in which the use of these harmful products at a young age has now escalated to being used on school property which is outrageous.

Around the U.S school districts are trying their hardest to reverse the epidemic of Juuling. The addictive effects of nicotine has completely hooked the brains of the younger generation by the harmful chemicals which this product contains. A school district states, “ The Juul explicitly markets its products to youths, leaving schools to shoulder the costs of stopping students from vaping, disciplining them when they break school rules and providing support services when they become addicted”. School districts have gone from enforcing education to now becoming a babysitter to help end an epidemic. Juul companies should be ashamed knowing that their inventions not only affect individuals health because of consumption, but also affect the school system. Instead of these companies trying to target young adults by promoting nicotine use, the should find something else to invent that can actually be of good use.

Unfortunately, students lack the true understanding of the long term effects and the toll it is taking on school districts. By school districts taking the action of filing lawsuits, this will hopefully help enlighten the companies of this product to reevaluate how easy and accessible this technology is towards teen purchase. Even though this incline has brought a substantial amount of income for e- cigarette companies, the effects it is creating should be recognized. Public officials have been taking a new stand on the usage of Juuling. It is ironic how companies are skilled in targeting the youth with products that can have terminal affects. The use of Juul’s should be considered detrimental. School Districts are trying to do anything in their path to create this decline. If making lawsuits against these companies will create awareness towards the situation, then why not? It is in the best interest of school officials to ensure the success in student’s safety and health.  

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3 Responses to Editorial for Portfolio – Hershey

  1. davidbdale says:

    Your sources and the quotes you use to provide evidence are good, Hersey, but your own comments on them add nothing additional. They are, in three cases out of three, just summaries of the quoted material.

    First Quote:

    The number of youth smokers has also been increasing. The CDC estimates that the number of middle and high school students who use e-cigarettes rose by more than 50% from 2017 to 2018 — from 2.1 million to 3.6 million.

    You add, in short, a summary:

    The rate of e-cigarette use by teens has been increasing and must be stopped. Youthful students who fall used these harmful products more every year.

    First Quote:

    Schools across the country are so fed up with student’s vaping on campus that they’re suing the e-cigarette manufacturer Juul Labs. Multiple districts filed lawsuits on Monday, including school systems in Olathe, Kan.; St. Charles, Mo.; Long Island, N.Y.; and La Conner, Wash.

    You add, in short, a summary:

    School districts are suing Juul for the outbreak of vaping on school grounds and are suing for the health damage to their students.

    Second Quote:

    Juul explicitly markets its products to youths, leaving schools to shoulder the costs of stopping students from vaping, disciplining them when they break school rules and providing support services when they become addicted.

    You add, in short, a summary:

    E-cigarettes addict young students to nicotine, putting a burden on school systems that diverts funds from learning development.

    The summaries are accurate but not needed, Hershey. Readers can easily understand the quotes without interpretation. Your job as the Editorial committee is to pull together information from a variety of sources, as you have, and craft an original argument that communicates an urgent situation with logic, reasoning, and appeals to emotion and ethics. Most of that requires your own original thinking and language. When you’ve written your own argument based on your understanding of the source material, quotes ADD legitimacy and specifics, often statistics, to your own writing. You seem to be writing instead by collecting useful quotes, placing them into a sequence, and trying to connect them with a sentence before and after.

    I suggest you start your Introduction with the observation that it’s about time Juul had to face up to the cost of cleaning up the mess it created by aggressively marketing e-cigarettes to a very vulnerable market segment. See where that bit of passion takes you.

    Was that helpful?
    Did it help you see anything you were unaware of?

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  2. hershey515 says:

    Can I please receive feedback on whether or not I properly stated my thesis statement effectively in which it identifies the issue?

    Like

    • davidbdale says:

      To answer your specific question, no, Hershey, you didn’t identify your actual thesis statement. The one you made bold is not your thesis. Your thesis is that Juul is getting the retribution it deserves for addicting teens to a harmful product. They should be made to pay for the damage their products cause on school campuses.

      Like

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