College Athletes Summer Work
In the article“What They Did Over Summer Vacation: Dreamed of Having One” (Sports pages, Aug. 1) Marc Tracy argues that college athletes are demanded high expectations coming into the program on the first day that the athlete has no summer. As a student athlete at Rowan University playing college sports has always been the goal. Signing a professional contract is obviously the final step every athlete would love to reach however the goal growing up is to play at the collegiate level. While being recruited for athletics at the university they informed me that I needed to approach this opportunity by showing up fit and ready to play. Everything works better if you have time management so if you have a daily routine to follow you still have a whole summer to relax and hang with friends. Getting to the college level doesn’t just come naturally. Hard work and dedication are the ultimate key to prepare you to play in a college sport. many schools provide you with a fitness packet for you to follow and this will only help the athlete prepare what they have been working for their whole lives. The editor describes a scenario about how the coach demanded they report back for preseason in the best shape of your life and if you are looking to actually step on the field at the collegiate level you better be. College athletes will put in the off-season work to perform at the highest level they can possibly be and still have the a very enjoyable summer.
i felt that this feedback led me in a very big step in the right direction. This guided me to adding in very important detail to my writing which will allow the reader to be engaged and get a better understanding of my view. The feedback given gives me a better understanding of where to apply each note you have written and will make my writing better. i hope to continuously receive good feedback like this to improve my writing skills.
JV, I’m glad you chose a topic about which you have personal knowledge. You’re smart to write about sports if sports is what you know. Readers will expect to learn something they didn’t find out reading the original article.
That doesn’t sound like an argument, JV. It’s an observation that doesn’t startle anyone as unexpected. But it does contain the very odd remark “that the athlete has no summer.” We assume you’re talking about incoming freshmen because you say “coming into the program.” But your paragraph doesn’t explain that those incoming freshmen often enroll early, come to campus early, and devote their last “summer off” to advance workouts and training. In other words, we don’t know what you’re talking about. You can’t expect readers to have read the original article, JV. It’s your obligation to supply them with the information they need to understand your objection or reaction to the original.
If this statement contained the information that you gave up summers during high school to prepare for college recruitment, we’d know your commitment meant more than just WANTING to achieve.
It’s hard to see how your letter differs from the information provided in the article, JV. You’re not complaining about the loss of your leisure time. On the other hand, you’re not exactly claiming that you DID give up your leisure time. If you’re going to use your experience as anecdotal evidence, we need to know what your experience WAS. There is one vague hint. Are you resisting the demand to give up your summer by suggesting that with proper time management you were able to workout hard and still have time for leisure? That would be MUCH clearer if you spoke of WHAT I DID instead of the vague—and in this class forbidden—WHAT YOU DO.
Hmmm. Still toeing that line. I’m going to suggest you object strenuously and clearly in the first paragraph to the very idea that athletics requires a full-year-round daily ON CAMPUS commitment. Using your own experience, and those of your teammates, insist that top conditioning can be achieved without a loss of personal freedom and autonomy.
And make it four or five well-developed paragraphs broken out with one main idea each, as I have modeled for you above. You have the seed of a fine, personal, passionate defense of your own life here, JV. Let’s make the most of the opportunity.
I hope you find these Notes helpful and not too intrusive, JV. Please let me know how you feel about the feedback. Much as I like to give advice, I very quickly start to ignore students who don’t keep the conversation going.
1. Respond to this feedback with a Reply.
2. Open your post in Edit and make revisions.
3. Update your post without creating a new one and without changing its title.
4. Leave me another Reply to alert me that you’ve made changes.
I look forward to seeing your revisions.