BetterLeftUnsaid – givemeclouttokens

1) When the parents of a man or woman haven’t voted in their lifetimes, then their child is not as likely to vote than they would be if he or she had been brought up in a household where the parents always vote.

1 a) when parents have never voted in their lifetime, then their child is not as likely to cote

2) If your parents or the head of the household in which you were raised are voters, you are far more likely to vote.

2 a) if a parent of a child have voted in their lifetime, then the child will be more likely to vote.

3) As genetic testing has demonstrated many times, residents of death row often spend the rest of their lives there for crimes they may or may not have committed.

3 a) residents of death row spend the rest of their lives there for their accused crimes.

4) Harvard is considered to be as difficult to get into if not more difficult as Yale.

4 a) Harvard is more difficult to get into than Yale.

5) Admissions officers are more likely to admit students who look like the majority of the student body even when they don’t appear to be prejudiced in other ways.

Admissions officers have a tendency to admit students who look like the majority of students.

6) My parole officer is one of those kinds of people where if I don’t show up for an appointment he always suspects me of doing something that violates the terms of my parole.

6 a) My parole officer suspects me of a crime if I don’t show up for my appointment.

7) The only kind of person who won’t buy this car is the kind that doesn’t understand that the car costs more to buy but that the savings in gas will make up for the higher cost in less than a year.

7 a)Smart investors buy this car knowing it saves more money on gas than any other mediocre car.

8) There is a tendency among children who have suffered from being abused when they were young to be more likely to abuse their own children when they have them later in life.

8 a)Adults who have been abused as children grow up to abuse their own children.

9) By getting better mileage than cars that run on gasoline only, cars that can switch from gas to electric when conditions permit it have been created to help drivers save money.

10) With their ability to run on gas or electricity depending on traffic conditions, drivers shopping for a new car have to decide between hybrids and cars with conventional engines.

11) Who wouldn’t prefer to drive a car that can switch from gasoline to electricity when conditions permit?

This entry was posted in Better Left Unsaid, givemeclouttokens. Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to BetterLeftUnsaid – givemeclouttokens

  1. davidbdale says:

    Many beautiful improvements here, Tokens, but several change or diminish the meaning of the original sentences instead of just editing them.

    10 and 11 not edited at all.


  2. davidbdale says:

    Hey, Tokens, I have produced a page of Models and Solutions for this exercise under the Models menu at the top of the blog.


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